Kissing Cousins - Deciphering Family Relationships In Your Ancestral Tree
December 1st, 2008

Joining the world of genealogy research can be quite exciting at times. At other times, though, it can be confusing and difficult. Not only can it be hard to locate sources of information about your family, it can also be hard to figure out who is related to whom. There are so many terms for relationships that most people do not know how do deal with the inundation of information. Hopefully, though, the below text will help sort a few things out.

Let's start with cousins, because there are so many different terms in this area, it can be really hard to sort things out. If someone came up to you and said they were your fourth cousin three times removed, it would be complicated to figure out whom they belonged to. Cousin, at its very base, means people who have the same grandparents. These people can also be referred to as first cousins. They are the children of aunts and uncles. Second cousins are people who have the same great-grandparents, but not the same grandparents. So if you think about your children and the children of your cousins, they are considered to be second cousins. It follows that third, fourth, and fifth cousins would have a very similar pattern. Third cousins would share the same great-great grandparents. Fourth cousins would share the same great-great-great grandparents. Fifth cousins would share the same great-great-great-great grandparents. It's rare to actually know your fifth cousins, but genealogy research can certainly uncover them for you.

In addition to cousins, you also have cousins who have been "removed." This does not mean they were excommunicated from the family or anything. It means that these particular cousins are from two different generations. Once removed means one generation of difference, twice removed means two generations of difference, and so on. Take this example to sort things out. Your mother's first cousin is your first cousin once removed. Here's another one. Your grandmother's first cousin is your first cousin twice removed. It still seems a bit complicated, doesn't it? It not only seems complicated to you, it can seem extraordinarily complicated to anyone who plans to read the research you are so carefully compiling. In addition to the other documentation you should consider using; you might want to think about downloading or copying a relationship chart to sort things out.

A relationship chart is a simple document that can help you figure out who is who in your family and how they are related to each other. Both the top and the left side labels will mirror each other. They should be: child, grandchild, great grandchild, and great-great grandchild. The middle of the chart gets a bit more complicated, as the relationships get more complicated. The first column, moving down, should read "sister or brother," "nephew or niece," "grand-nephew or niece," and "grand-grand-nephew or niece." The second column, moving down, should read "nephew or niece," "first cousin," "first cousin, once removed," and "first cousin, twice removed." The third column, moving down, should read "grand-nephew or niece," "first cousin, once removed," "second cousin," and "second cousin, once removed." The final column should read, moving down, "grand-grand nephew or niece," "first cousin, twice removed," "second cousin, once removed," "third cousin." This sounds incredibly complicated, and to some degree it is and always will be. In reality, most people simply aren't going to care when it hits this degree of complication, but a relationship chart like this one can really help you sort things out as you try to write your own family history.

To further complicate the family relationships you are trying to determine, don't forget that some families may have a situation with double-cousins. This means that the siblings from one family married the siblings from another family. For example, perhaps your grandmother and her sister married your grandfather and his brother, respectively.

You should be aware that the word "cousin," and many other familial terms have changed over the course of time. Some are even Latin. As a result, it is not a bad idea to check with a standard family term glossary as you are trying to complete your research. There are many of these in your local library. You can also look around online to find a standard familial term glossary

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